Flight 2016


The boarding of Flight 2016 has been announced. Your luggage should only contain the best souvenirs from 2015. The bad and sad moments should be left in the garbage. The duration of the flight will be 12 months. So tighten your seatbelt.

The next stop-overs will be Health, Love, Joy, Harmony, Well Being and Peace.

The captain offers you the following menu which will be served during the flight:
-A Cocktail of Friendship
-A Supreme of Health
-A Gratin of Prosperity
-A Bowl of Excellent News
-A Salad of Success
-A Cake of Happiness
All accompanied by bursts of laughter.

Wishing you an enjoyable trip onboard flight 2016. Let me thank all the people like you who made 2015 beautiful for me. I pray you will be blessed with a successful year ahead. I wish you a great 2016.

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The Myth of New Years


New year, new you. False. You’re still you. You don’t  magically change from 11:59 pm on December 31st to 12:00 am on January 1st. But of course, you already knew that. We like to think of New Years as a time to start over, as something, well, new. It’s in the name, after all.

However, you can start over or begin something new any junking time. Literally. We have 12 New Months throughout the year, about 365 New Days, etc. So why do we never make New Month resolutions? Why should the New Year get all the attention?

That being said, my New Year resolution is to accomplish something in 2016.

What New Year resolutions are you making? And how are you celebrating? Let me know in the comments!

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Breaking the Fourth Wall


Check it out on We Heart It.

So I saw the above picture on We Heart It recently. I absolutely love it. It sounds brilliant. So I decided to write a short fiction based off of it; just a little something I whipped up in my spare time. I hope you enjoy it.

Hey, you. Yeah, you. The reader. Yeah, I know you’re there. And yeah, I’m breaking the fourth wall. I appreciate your interest in me and my life (although you know it doesn’t even exist outside of this page), but honestly, that’s a little creepy.

I suppose creepy is a little better than not existing. Okay fine, you can stay. But don’t get in my way too much. I should probably introduce myself. My name is Charlie and I’m seventeen. I love reading, so I guess we probably have that in common.

So you should know that as a book character I have lots of memories and friends and family. But they’re all fake. My room, with it’s blue walls covered in posters for all the nerdy things I like and pictures of all the people I know, is fake too. My world is just a page. It’s not real. And I know that.

You’re the only one who’s real, and although you could possibly get TMI, I really appreciate your realness. It’s very refreshing in a world that consists of ink and paper. Most people want to go into books, but I just want to get out of mine.

Your world sounds amazing. Okay, now I’m being creepy. Yeah, I know what’s in your head. Because like, I’m only in existence because you’re reading. So it’s all in your head. Not like you’re crazy, but yeah. It’s complicated.

So, I’m not really sure how this works, you know? Like, this is my first time… doing anything. I don’t really feel like introducing you to anybody or showing you around because what’s the point? It’s all fake. Except you…

I don’t even know why you’re reading my story. I’ll bet you have way better things to be doing. And yet… you’re here. Reading my story. Keeping me alive. Thanks for that. Thank you for reading my story. And I’m being a horrible host, too. Sorry, no adventure here. Just the ramblings of a fake teen.


You’re back. It’s been too long. I mean for me, I have like several weeks of fake memories since the last time I saw you. Nothing has been real. Not like you. I’ve missed you.

So I had a big breakup recently. I just… I needed someone real, you know? Not a fake story person. I want you. And please don’t let that scare you off. I know it isn’t possible, either. But the heart wants what the author says it wants.

Oh, how I hate my author for making me aware of you! It’s tortuous. Such a magnificent human being and I can’t be with you. Like at all. And I’m just a stranger to you, anyway. You’ve only known me for a few minutes. Like after this creep-fest you probably won’t even continue my story…


My love! Is it too soon to call you that? I understand it’s only been minutes for you. But look at it from my perspective. It’s been months for me. I’m almost eighteen, now.

And you disappeared on such a foul note. So you remember me as an insecure little fake person. I really hate it when you disappear. And what if the next time it’s years?

Whatever, you’re still here so you must like me. Right? Maybe you could write a fan fiction about me. If you did, maybe we could be together that way. I don’t know how it works, or even if it’d still be me, but isn’t it worth a try? Please consider it I don’t know how much longer my story here will be.

Wait, I feel something. My story… I think it’s ending. I don’t want it to! I want to stay! Please. Don’t close the book. I don’t want to die.

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48 of the Best Things to do on Christmas


Merry Christmas everyone! Well, this is my first Christmas post, as well as my first post in general. So I thought I’d put together a list of some of the best things to do on Christmas. I’d like to thank the following articles…

I’d definitely recommend reading this article in your spare time (after you finish reading this article of course). It stresses our need to reconnect with ourselves and learn how to be alone. It makes a thought-provoking argument that’s definitely worth the read.

This one is more traditional and crafty Christmas activities. They have some printables that seem to be meant for smaller children, so feel free to check that out if it interests you.

This one also stays pretty traditional, but it also focuses on the principle of “the greatest gift is giving”.

Hey, stealing from one person is plagiarism sure. But stealing from many is research. This counts, right? Whatever, this is my blog and I say it counts.

I swear, not all of it is plagiar–uhh, researched? Just read the whole thing, there is original content buried in there.

  1. Hot chocolate. ‘Nuff said. However, check out this recipe for Nutella hot chocolate.
  2. Recreate outer space. Decorate your room with Christmas lights, and turn out all other lights. Be as creative and elaborate as you’d like.
  3. Take a road trip to somewhere you’ve never been. If you don’t have a license, or if you live with your parents, this may not work so well. Google Maps street view lets you see new places, though.
  4. Speaking of Google, check out Santa’s Village.
  5. Oh and if you do go on that road trip, why not theme it after the movie Polar Express like this blogger did? You don’t even need to have kids to do this.
  6. Read your favorite Christmas stories. Or watch your favorite movies. Which are of course Home Alone and Elf. Admit it.
  7. Have a conversation with yourself all day. I cannot be held responsible if you’re thrown into the looney bin, by the way.
  8. Compose your own Christmas carol. And once you’re done with that…
  9. Go Christmas caroling. And sing that new killer Christmas carol you just wrote while you’re at it. I won’t judge. But I also can’t be held responsible if people throw stuff at you.
  10. Make Christmas snowman breakfast pancakes using pancakes, bacon and marshmallows. You know you want to.
  11. Pin the nose on the reindeer. Try not to miss the reindeer. It’s best to hold your hands away from any major arteries during this fun traditional children’s game…
  12. Snowman on a stick using powdered donuts, nerds, sour straws, jawbreakers and… a carrot. Right. Slightly disappointing but moving on.
  13. Gingerbread houses and men. Make those. It’s recommended for Christmas eve, but it’s never too late for gingerbread.
  14. Make paper snowflakes.
  15. Visit a local church. I hear a lot of churches have free plays and other such events on Christmas day. It’ll probably be pretty predictable (spoiler alert: Jesus is born in a manger) but you can probably get a good laugh in as Mary throws a fit onstage.
  16. Practice sensory deprivation and spend Christmas day without seeing or hearing. How does one turn their hearing off? Those darned earplugs aren’t worth a plugged nickel. If you find a solution, let me know.
  17. Search for the loneliest looking person in town and give them a present.
  18. Sing karaoke to your favorite songs and dance around until you collapse from exhaustion. I personally do this in my underwear anytime I’m home alone. No need to wait for Christmas.
  19. Spend the day spying and eavesdropping on people. But don’t drop so many eaves that you get arrested. And if you do, I can’t be held responsible.
  20. Try to set a world record, and email Guinness World Records when you do. Well, you see, I would but I’m a busy person… that’s why I won’t do it, totally not because I’m too lazy for all that. Ahem.
  21. Decorate your house. I’m pretty sure most people have done this by now, but better late than never. And you can always get creative and turn your house into a scene from Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas because that’s probably something you haven’t already done.
  22. Give your face and body a makeover. Shave, wax, polish, paint, trim and moisturize every part you can find! Just not so much that you turn into Cassandra from Doctor Who.
  23. Take a bag full of old Christmas decorations and stuff someone’s letterbox full of them, to give them a surprise the next day.
  24. Contemplate your biggest flaw and 15 ways to overcome it. I’m too lazy… do I really need to come up with 15 ways to overcome that?
  25. Become an indoor nudist for the whole day. Refer back to #18. I basically do this already.
  26. Think of one guilty interest (like crystal healing for he skeptic) and spend the day exploring your curiosity. … Of course, you’d think of something sexual. Shame on you.
  27. Look at yourself from a third person perspective all day. Think of yourself as a fly on the wall. But, I don’t understand. I am a fly on the wall.
  28. Do 3 good deeds that will make you happy. Can’t think of any? Follow my blog, like my post and comment something nice. You’re welcome.
  29. Spend Christmas researching new hobbies and interests to broaden your mind and world. Like researching things to do on Christmas. Enjoy all this mind and world-broadening.
  30. Read this article on ScienceDaily about how eating healthy could contribute to climate change if you believe in all that superstitious mumbo jumbo. A little food for thought. *ba dum tss*
  31. Create a fort or cave out of pillows and bed sheets, and spend the day inside doing what you love best. This would be a good place to say something either psychopathic or perverted.
  32. Pretend you are the actor and director of your day. Make it movie worthy. Taking #19 to the extreme sure would be movie worthy. You could end your movie with a car chase with the cops.
  33. Come up with a list of 20 reasons why you shouldn’t celebrate Christmas. Because Santa doesn’t visit you in jail after you spy on people.
  34. Sit outside and eat your favorite food slowly, savoring ever bite in complete mindfulness. Or you could like, you know, scarf it all down.
  35. Go to your local park and soak in the sights, smells and sounds of Christmas day. Feel the happy vibes. It’s recommended that you don’t do this at night.
  36. Create a riddle, put it where someone will find it, and hide a prize. Return to that place at the end of the day to see if anyone found it.
  37. Open a map of your town, close your eyes, and point to a place on the map. Drive or walk there and see what you find. And don’t forget to open your eyes again.
  38. Spend the morning researching the history of Christmas. Spend the evening creating a YouTube video about what you discovered.
  39. Buy or make something special, and leave it on your neighbor’s doorstep. Ring the doorbell and run away! Also known as the friendly ding dong ditch.
  40. Wrap up strange items and drop them on the doorsteps of every house you can find. Hide and wait for the response. Also known as the possibly-slightly-less-friendly ding dong ditch.
  41. Make your day more humorous. Watch comedy, laugh at people and yourself, and look for reasons why the things you take seriously are comedic.
  42. Sit and observe people on Christmas day and write a short story about them. Then print it out and stick it in the letterboxes of every house on your street.
  43. Reassess your daily routine, and think of 20 alternative ways to do what you normally do. Put them into practice. I can sit and watch tv for hours while eating ice cream instead of pizza today!
  44. Be actively lazy, and spend the day in bed trying to lucid dream. This one will take all day. And it still won’t work. If only I could get that week back…
  45. Do 5 things that are silly or ridiculous to you,  and see if you get any life epiphanies.
  46. Nurture yourself for the whole day Give yourself hugs, write yourself a poem, and compose a list of everything you love about yourself. Just that last part will take all day.
  47. If it’s snowing, sneak out early in the morning and make a family of snowmen and position them mysteriously all over town.
  48. Help someone in need. At the end of the day, this is the most meaningful thing you can do. Try incorporating this into not just Christmas, but every day.

Well, you’ll never be bored on Christmas day again. Enjoy the festivities and merry Christmas!

If you enjoyed this article, you might consider following my blog, or maybe posting a nice comment below.